Reading time: 3 – 4 minutes

I am often asked by students if it is a good or bad idea for a leader to socialize with subordinates outside of work. There are a lot of tradeoffs, and this is a complex question. I break down the variables in this article.

It is often a quandary for leaders to know whether to socialize with workers at after work events. Here are some tips that may help the decision process:

1. It is always situational. There are times where it is expected for a leader to participate and there are other situations where it would be dead wrong for a leader to socialize. You need to use good judgment and follow some consistent pattern.
2. If you have a corporate policy on this subject, you need to follow that. Often the corporate ban on socializing has an escape clause for certain types of events.
3. The most important consideration is whether the employees and you are all comfortable with your attendance. If several people (including you) have some reservations, it is better to take a rain check.
4. If you decide to attend certain types of functions, like for example birthday parties offsite, you need to do the same for everyone when schedules permit. If you attend the party for one person but not another, you will appear to be playing favorites.
5. It would be a good idea to have an open discussion at work about this subject to get an idea how most people feel about it before establishing your pattern.
6. If alcohol is involved, you need to especially wary of accepting drinks. I remember one supervisor who became totally drunk at an event because the underlings kept buying him cocktails. It was a very bad scene.
7. Unless you have a very friendly group, it is best to avoid any activity that involves physical contact, like dancing for instance. You can quickly get into a compromised position quite innocently.
8. Take notice of the habits of other leaders in your organization that you respect. If they refrain from attending social events, then you want to be especially conservative.
9. Try to avoid parties that start out in public restaurants but migrate to one person’s house.
10. Do not participate in any kind of gambling when out with employees.
11. Do not volunteer to take intoxicated employees home. Get them a Taxi cab.

Those are some general precepts that may help you think about the issue more deeply. Here are a few suggestions of how to limit your risk.

1. Consider making a brief appearance near the start of the event, but not participate in the entire thing. This allows you to show respect for everyone, but avoids a lot of jeopardy. Watch the body language carefully to see if people are offended at your leaving early. If so, stay longer, but leave as soon as you reasonably can.
2. The best place to put limits on your outside socializing is when you are at work. Show by your body language and hesitation if you think you might be getting into a compromising situation.
3. Remember even though you are “off duty,” your relationships with the people who work for you is still very much “on duty.”
4. Whenever there is a doubt, always take the most conservative posture.

Robert T. Whipple is the CEO of Leadergrow Inc., a teaching and consulting company.

Reading time: 3 – 5 minutes

How in sync are you with the employees, team or customers you work with? Does it matter? Probably more than we give credit. Building rapport is an important part of moving ahead in your career.

I remember years ago when I was getting ready to interview for a position. Someone gave me a book that I eventually lent out and never got back.

For the life of me, I can’t recall the title of the book, but I do remember the valuable lesson I learned from it. The technique that I have used many times is called mirroring or being in sync with the other person.

It is a simple concept, yet requires practice to make it seamless.

Being in sync or mirroring can be done on a verbal or non-verbal level. It is not limited to interviewing situations, it can be used in any individual or small group meeting.

It is easier to use in an individual meeting as the clues will be more defined. If you use it in a small group meeting, let the decision maker or leader of the group be your primary focus.

Verbal Approach

If I want to mirror someone verbally, I would answer the question in the same manner it was asked. The premise is that I want to respond with my information in the format that is most desirable to the recipient. This may be different from my native approach.

Here a couple of examples where an interviewer may ask similar questions, yet seek a different kind of response:

John says: “What are the top reasons for why I should consider you for this position?” Your response would be short with specific details, highlighting your point quickly.

Conversely, if Mary asks, “Why should I consider you for this position over another candidate?” This question is more open ended, implying a broader, big picture approach with examples of why I should be selected.”

If I am mirroring them well, the conversation will flow quickly to the next question. There may be an apparent appearance that we are “filling in the blanks” with each other.

Failing to be in sync, will typically illicit a follow on question, probing the same question in a different way until they find the answer they are looking for or they give up.

Nonverbal Approach

Sitting across from an interviewer, if you are able to pick up the nonverbal approach of your interviewer, you may be able to be in sync with them. For example, if they:

• Lean forward or backward in their chair
• Have strong or weak eye contact
• Use their hands expressively
• Vary the pace, tone or inflection of their voice

You would be able to mirror that same activity. We often build rapport quickly with people who are like us. If we act similarly, the other person becomes more comfortable and less on edge with us. The increase in receptivity can give us the advantage we are seeking to gain.

As a word of caution, practice the art of mirroring before entering into an important meeting or interview. To actively engage yourself in the observation and execution of mirroring can divert you from utilizing your listening skills.

If the other person senses you are not engaged, it won’t matter how well you think you are in sync…the mirror will shatter and your rapport is lost.

Lynn Dessert owns Leadership Breakthrough, improving personal communication and influence one step at a time. Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 4 – 6 minutes

Sometimes the Elephant at Work is your wardrobe malfunction – it can happen to both men and women. Chances are everyone has probably experienced it. It can be more stressful when it happens at pivotal times – you are heading to an important meeting or going on an interview. There are some things you can do in advance to help prevent the occurrence and if you find your self in the moment, hopefully you’ll have a few of these wardrobe savers in reach.

Preventive Measures

• If it is too tight, don’t fight it. Acknowledge the few extra pounds you may have gained or blame the dryer for shrinking your favorite piece of clothing – but just leave it at home. If it is something you can’t part with, then visit a tailor to see if you can let it out.
• Fix It Promptly. If your zipper is catching, your hem is unraveling or your button is loose, mend it right away. Set the item aside in the “fix it” pile and tackle it while you catch up with your favorite television program or let the tailor fix it.
• Retire the Worn Favorites. When your shoes have been resoled too many times, your pants are looking less crisp, there are stains on your shirts or your favorite top has so many pills, it’s time to part with them. Consider if they are worthy to donate to a charitable organization such as Salvation Army, Goodwill or Volunteers of America.
• Do the Double Take. In a hurry? Slow down and take that second look in the mirror before leaving the house or the restroom. Check yourself from head to toe. Make sure everything is tucked in, zipped up and presentable.
• Have a Plan B. If you are attending an important meeting or going on a trip, ensure you have some extra clothing just in case something happens to your primary suit or outfit.
• Know your personal challenges. Prone to dripping your coffee on your shirt on the way to work? Have an extra one handy in the car. Better yet, make sure your coffee cup lid opening is not on the seam – it is usually the culprit of the leak! Are you prone to putting runs in your hose? Carry an extra pair.

Crisis Management

• Wardrobe First Aid Kit. Pack a small case of indispensable items you’ll be glad to have on hand. Keep it in a handy place. Include the following:
  • Safety pins – great for hems or closing gaps. Keep some different sizes on hand.
  • Travel Sewing Kit – needles, black, white and blue threads
  • Lint remover roller or masking tape
  • Nail polish for those nasty runs
  • Tide to Go

• Layer in a Pinch. Bring along a sweater or jacket to help cover up that spot or split that suddenly appears!
• Humor Goes A Long Way. Embarrassing as it might be, put your elephant or wardrobe malfunction squarely on the table with the other person. You will relieve your stress of trying to cover it up and turn the focus on the more important issue at hand.

Lynn Dessert owns Leadership Breakthrough, improving personal communication and influence one step at a time. Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 3 – 4 minutes

Jim “Worthless” is an Engineering manager at a large company. That is not his real last name; it is what his employees call him behind his back.

Jim is known for making commitments and then handing them off to his people to complete with very little direction. If you were to talk to his employees they would share their frustrations with you.

The employees sometimes feel unequipped to handle the situation because they are not aware of all the details. Consequently, the customer service is poor and it is a reflection on them.

One day, Ron came into Jim’s office to ask him some questions about another mess that was dumped into his lap at the last minute. As was the norm, Jim proceeded to tell him he was too busy to talk to him right now and asked him to come back in five minutes.

At the appointed time, Ron returns to the office, only to find that Jim is gone. No one knows where he is or when he is going to return. This is not the first time this has happened; it is a common tactic that Jim employs with his people.

Ron is disillusioned and decides it is time to take some action. The next time he sees Jim, instead of asking for a meeting immediately, Ron tells Jim to come find him when he is ready to talk. Guess what – Ron waited a long time for Jim.

Was this a good decision for Ron to make? As it turns out, Ron soon became an ex-employee. Did he get let go because of what he did in this situation? We may never know for sure.

There was a more fruitful option for Ron to consider in this situation. It is not unreasonable to ask for your manager to help you through a tough situation.

We sometimes forget that bosses do not have all the answers. Your boss may be giving you the messy problems because they think that you can solve them better.

Bosses do not like to be put “on the spot”. Giving the boss some wiggle room can go a long way to getting more cooperation.

Try not to think you are getting dumped on, but that you are being presented with an opportunity to meet a new challenge. If you continue to see a pattern with the same problems over and over, look for ways to correct the system or process.

If you find that your manager avoids your impromptu visits into the office and you really need their opinion, it might be because they feel like they are being ambushed.

Consider writing down the issues you want to discuss and send it to them in a letter or by email. Request a time to meet with them to discuss the issues. Identify what information is missing and allot time to do some brainstorming on solutions.

By giving the boss “think time” before asking for a meeting or response and you might find them to be more receptive to giving you the information you need to be successful.

Lynn Dessert owns Leadership Breakthrough, improving personal communication and influence one step at a time. Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 4 – 7 minutes

A co-worker has cancer. What will they do? What do you do? It is definitely an awkward moment for many people.

I was talking with a Sales Manager on the phone. One of his employees has cancer. As the employee shares his condition with his boss, he clearly states, “I don’t want there to be an elephant in the room with my co-workers. I don’t want them to talk about it behind my back. I want them to talk to me about it openly.”

Not everyone feels the same way.

Some people want to talk about it; others may want to avoid the conversation at work; opting for more privacy. They may fear their co-workers will see them differently. It is a personal choice, and the only way to honor their choice is for someone to ask them what they want or wait until they are ready to share their condition.

What Does the Employee Do?

The first decision is who should know? It is important to share your condition with your boss for a number of reasons. It is better to have the conversation at the onset, rather than when the boss begins to notice a pattern of absences or decline in work productivity.

The organization will be better prepared to understand why you are missing work because of appointments or ill effects of your treatment. Employee centric companies will voluntarily make accommodations for you.

Most employers are bound to protect your legal rights – for both you and your family members. Visit the U.S. Department of Labor Website for information on the Family and Medical Leave Act.

Initially, your boss may suggest you tell co-workers who are working on projects with you. Your absences may affect the time lines of projects. Letting them make contingency plans or push out due dates will show you are working together as a team.

Some of your co-workers may feel uncomfortable hearing all the details. When in doubt, ask them how much information they want you to share with them. If they are not sure, make it OK for them to tell you they have heard enough or figure out a secret code that lets them tell you they have absorbed all they can.

What if I am the Boss?

As the boss, your staff will be looking to you to provide guidance, sensitivity and concern. At the first hint of absentee patterns, you should be talking to your employee. While you should not force an employee to share their condition, having a conversation where you show concern may open the door for the employee to share their situation more readily.

If the employee is not ready to share information, you will likely treat the absenteeism as a controllable event and that the employee is being irresponsible. Often, this kind of behavior leads to disciplinary action.

If your gut tells you something is going on with the employee and they are reluctant to talk with you; ask them if they want to talk with the Human Resources Department – they may be better able to assist them on a confidential basis. Some companies have Employee Assistance Programs (EAP) in place to help employees with difficult situations by talking to trained professionals outside the organization.

Learn more What Supervisors Can Do from the American Cancer Association.

What if I am the Co-Worker?

There are a number of ways to acknowledge that someone has an illness. News like this travels quickly in organizations and sometimes the employee would rather let the grapevine inform their co-workers instead of talking to each one of them directly. If you hear about something this way, ask if the information is public knowledge – sometimes the grapevine can be more hurtful than helpful.

If you are close to them, they probably will share the information with you. However, if you learn about someone’s illness from the grapevine, don’t take it personally.

Initiating a conversation with someone based on grapevine information requires sensitivity and respect. Let them know you have heard they are experiencing some health issues (details are not necessary) and you are there to be supportive. Now is not the time to pry. Let them open up to you when they are ready to. They might never be…if so, just respect and accept their privacy.

If the illness is common knowledge and you do not know the person well, but are in the same work group, consider a hand written card or note to leave on their desk. Keep it simple, again offering words of concern, support and encouragement.

Avoid telling the person you know how they feel. They will never think you understand, because you are not them in that situation. If you have been through a similar situation, you can share your feelings about how you felt. The best thing to do is to listen and acknowledge their situation. Let them know you want them to get better. You can find more information on talking with someone who has cancer at Cancer.net.

Lynn Dessert owns Leadership Breakthrough, improving personal communication and influence one step at a time. Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 3 – 4 minutes

When is the last time you embraced your fears? There are different kinds of fears. Sometimes we fear the unknown, other times we fear what we know or think we know.

When we fear the known, we may have had direct experience with the fear. It is possible we tried to conquer it and failed and now we avoid it. For example, down hill skiing is a fear of mine. I have tried it several times and every time I hit that bunny hill, fear overcomes me. Visions of falling and breaking a bone flash in my mind. Is it rational? No. Is it probable? Likely, with my level of confidence.

The same might hold true for someone who is afraid of public speaking. Bill presents to the management team and it does not go well. Afterward, the feedback from his boss and peers is negative; focusing on Bill’s lack luster delivery, style and content. Having a bad experience can divert us from trying to get better, especially if the road to becoming proficient is a long one. The best way to tackle the fear is to chunk it up into smaller goals and celebrate the little steps of progress as The Positively Blog shares in his 5 life-changing keys to overcoming your fear.

Sometimes we fear the unknown – or what we think we can not control. We don’t like unknowns, so we might try to “fill in the blanks” – which leads to assumptions. In reality, we could be making up excuses for our inaction.

Shelia tells me the other day she fears she will be laid off since the company is offering early retirements due to business being down 25%. She is not eligible to take the retirement since she is a short service employee, even though she is 60 years old. She realizes there will be hurdles looking for a job at her age.

Let’s hope she does not paralyze herself in this situation. What she knows is the company needs to reduce staff, what she fears is she might fall victim to the personnel cuts.  Companies going through the layoff process usually have predefined method for reductions in force, otherwise known as a RIF plan. If there is a union, the contract will outline the formal process for selection. If the selection criterion is seniority based, then there is very little she can do to prevent her departure. Some companies prefer to layoff employees based on their skills and performance, though it requires a higher level of due diligence.

In this case, Shelia is still probably not in a position to affect the outcome. Why? Because of timing. There is very little she can do today; her performance reviews tell the story. What she can do is to look at how to protect her future risk. Having favorable performance reviews and attaining skills that are unique or provide a competitive advantage will increase her value with management. There are some good tips on Making Performance Reviews Less Stressful – for Everyone on ways to focus on improvement.

Shelia can exert more control over her fears of layoff by taking action to position her as indispensable. And if the company does let her go, those skills will differentiate her from the rest of her applicants.

Lynn Dessert owns Leadership Breakthrough, improving personal communication and influence one-step at a time. Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 3 – 5 minutes

The pivotal point in my career was over 20 years ago in 1987. I went to work for a new company and I made a change from operations management to human resources. The road in operations was very difficult – but that’s another story.

While in retail operations, my focus was to help run a store. In my new role, I was in an office environment and I was deficient in a number of administrative skills. I remember taking home the big Compaq portable computer to teach myself how to use programs, e.g. WordPerfect (which appears to be the choice of lawyers) and Lotus. I could not justify learning to use a computer during work hours.

About three months into my tenure, the company receives an Affirmative Action Plan audit letter from the Office of Federal Contract Compliance Programs (OFCCP). Our auditor is arriving within 30 days, and of course, the plan and records are not up to date. Compiling the information and doing the analysis is very labor intensive. And, let’s not think about the fact that the OFCCP’s watchful eye is on us for a past infraction.

My boss has never been through an audit, nor has he written a plan. Now is not the time for modesty, I speed dial to the corporate experts asking for guidance. I research how to construct a plan from scratch. I review the previous plan and find it to be incomplete. The decision is obvious, start from scratch and do it right.

We make it through the audit with accolades. All I knew is that I spent all my waking hours making it right. Little did I realize that project might have put me on the radar screen with superiors in the company!

The Sector Human Resources department was creating a High Potential Management Program. I was invited to be apart of it. I was the only internal candidate. All the other participants were fresh out MBA graduates from targeted schools.

For the next four years, the company navigates my career, provides me opportunities to parachute into high impact projects and initiatives. The experience accelerates my technical and business growth. The management knew what I did not know and thoughtfully weighed what was best for my career and the company; creating a win-win scenario. Along the way, I find a great mentor. I meet a lot of talented people and realize they do not receive the same consideration. I wonder why.

The company continues to infuse the program with external candidates. I reflect on what might be their reluctance to consider internal candidates, it might be:

• Your boss has to nominate you. My bosses sponsored me.
• It’s hard to unplug someone from their current role. Bosses feel they invest time in you and want to reap the benefits. My bosses were willing to put the company and my career interests first.
• Bosses see all the warts in their internal candidates. Let’s remember the externals have them too; we just don’t know what they are!
• Fresh outs are often more mobile and they accept the reality of being transferred. I was open to moving since I was single.
• Internal candidates are just too far along in their career, we want them early. I was within my first year of employment with the company; three years with another company.
• Minimum educational requirements of MBA were hard to find internally. I had the requirements.

Maybe I was lucky. I was definitely in the right place at the right time. It took drive, initiative, flexibility, adaptability and risk-taking to undertake the path. Bosses never know if their internal candidates will make the same sacrifices until you ask them.

Issues to discuss? Stories to Share? Post your thoughts or email me!

Reading time: 4 – 7 minutes

Did you learn all you really need to know about innovation in kindergarten? Funny thing, but as we grow-up and get “smarter”, we tend to make things more complicated than they need to be, and innovation is no exception. Innovation is complex enough to begin with; so let’s look at a lesson we learned as children that can help simplify it and deliver more impact.

My wife has taught four and five year olds for over 25 years now, and occasionally, I’m lucky enough to visit one of her classrooms and see her at work. When I do, I usually learn (or re-learn) something myself. During one visit, it struck me how smooth playtime was. You would think that a room full of five year olds would be a real beehive of activity; while the children were certainly displaying all of the energy and enthusiasm you would expect, they weren’t flitting from one activity to the next. Since five year olds don’t have the longest attention spans, I marveled, “How do you keep them so focused?”

“It’s easy” she replied. “They know they’re not allowed to start a new activity until they finish playing with the old one and put it away.” Wow!

What a simple, but powerful lesson – Focus on one thing at a time and finish it before moving on to the next task. The children know they can’t jump from working on a puzzle over to the sand table until they’ve finished, picked up all the pieces, put them back in the box and put it back on the shelf.

To observe the world today, you would think it was just the opposite. Multi-tasking would appear to be critical to productivity. Why else would we hail it as a “must have” talent? Why would job descriptions list it as a required skill? We’ve forgotten that simple lesson from childhood. The reality is that multi-tasking is a myth: a myth that destroys productivity. That’s right; people can’t do multiple things at the same time.

Don’t take my word for it. Cognitive research has verified that people are incapable of multi-tasking.* Yes, almost anyone can walk and chew gum at the same time. But for any task that takes cognitive function such as thinking, writing, speaking, planning, or designing, we actually switch-task. We switch back and forth between tasks. That’s why talking on the phone and driving at the same time leads to the dangerous behaviors we’ve all seen like swerving, driving through red lights, or veering across multiple lanes to get to a missed exit.

Physical peril aside, the real problem is that multi-tasking is a huge productivity killer. Your brain takes time to switch from one activity to another; for highly complex tasks, like new product development, it can take 20 minutes to get back into a highly productive flow. Many times people struggle to get 20 minutes of uninterrupted work, so they rarely get into the zone. Additionally, when you switch tasks, you often forget some part of what you had been working on previously. Compound this with frequent switching throughout the day and it’s a wonder anything ever gets done.

How does this affect innovation? A study of engineers found that the percentage of value added work dropped rapidly when they were assigned to more than 2 projects at a time. With 5 projects, value add had dropped to only 20%. As multi-tasked as people are today, it shouldn’t be a surprise that it’s taking longer and longer to get all of the work done. What a demoralizing effect.

How can you avoid this problem? Simply limit the number of project assignments to just a few at a time and encourage focused effort on one task at a time. I routinely find companies assigning people to 5 or even 6 projects; so this one change could easily double productivity. Additionally, think about how much more engaged your workforce would be if 60-80% of their efforts were adding value rather than only 20-30%.

What strategies can help you eliminate multi-tasking? The best of time management teaches the importance of being in the moment and focusing on the task at hand. When you are working on something, commit, focus, and work on that task until you complete it. For larger tasks, try putting blocks of time on your calendar.

To do this, you’ll also need to find a way to eliminate distractions:
1) Don’t check email mail during that time. Turn off any email notifier, and try to limit yourself to check them only at two or three set times each day.
2) Ditto for voicemail. Change your message so callers know you’ll get back to them in a few hours. Also, let them know how they can reach you in an emergency – which it will almost never be.
3) Ban Blackberry’s in the office and in meetings. It’s like an IV for email addicts.
4) Shut the open door policy. It hurts everyone’s productivity when people drop in any time they feel like it. Set aside certain times when your door is open and use the other times for productive work. If it’s an emergency, they’ll interrupt. Better yet, they’ll solve it without you.
5) Encourage your team members to do the same.

The Takeway:

In kindergarten, we learned that it’s best to focus on one thing at a time. As adults trying to jam as much as possible into our busy days, we quickly forget that lesson. For more impact from your innovation:
• Assign people to a maximum of two projects at the same time.
• Encourage people to work on one task at a time.
• Support team members in eliminating distractions by managing email, voice mail, and open door times.
• Communicate these changes and the reasons behind them across the organization so people understand and support the change.

End Notes:
* Rubinstein, Joshua S. and David E. Meyer, eds. Executive control of cognitive processes in task switching, Journal of Experimental Psychology – Human Perception and Performance, Vol. 27, No.4

Copyright 2009. Guided Innovation Group LLC and Mike Dalton. All rights reserved.

Reading time: 4 – 7 minutes

When is the last time you told your boss “Thank You”? You may have just received recognition for a job well done, a promotion, or even a good performance review. You may be leaving the company and you want to tell you boss how much you appreciate them. Your boss may have helped you personally with a problem outside of work or it could be something that often goes unnoticed – they just let you do your job without a lot of interference and tons of support.

Electronic or Paper

So how does someone go about saying thank you in a meaningful way? Today’s technology might steer you toward sending an email. It is probably the quickest way to accomplish this task, but I think this is more than a task. It should be a message with meaning, not just with your words, but the delivery of the message too.

The best impression you can make is to have a note card and hand write your message in it. The outside of your card may just say “Thank You”, such as Black and Cream Thank You Cards or 48-Count Border Multi-Pack Thank You Notes. Another option is to have your initials on the front on a card like this: Personalized Stationery, Classic Frame Monogram Note Cards or customize it even more: Custom Name Personalized Note Cards. Keep it simple. The front of a card should not be distracting; it should be professional, yet personal.

Inside, the card is blank, leaving you plenty of space to write your message. You may want to consider buying a large set of cards to keep on hand because they are so versatile. If your budget is limited or you need something fast, spend the $3-4 at your drug or Hallmark store. Now, is not the time to be a cheapskate when you are telling someone you appreciate them!

The message is the most important part of a “Thank You”. Practice writing out what you want to say on a separate piece of paper and continue to revise and review it until you are satisfied. Does the message tell your boss what you want to say? The message does not have to be long, in fact, using a small note card will limit what you can write – and yes, it is OK to have some white space. To help you craft your message, think about 1) what they did and 2) why you appreciated what they did. An example might be:

I want to thank you for your support and understanding while I went through a difficult time with my mother’s illness. Knowing that my job was secure while I dealt with my family issues allowed me to focus on getting them the care they needed.

I want to thank you for being instrumental in helping me shape my career. You have taught me more than I could have hoped for in the last two years. It is difficult to leave this organization, and I hope we continue our professional relationship beyond my departure.

Once you are satisfied with your message, take your time to write it in your card. Make sure to sign it, so they know who sent to them!

If you think writing a personal message is too difficult; you may opt to buy a card with one already written for you. Pay close attention to the tone you are setting, for e.g. a humorous card may not be the best way to tell them thank you in a more serious moment. Try to add a few of your own words at the end of the card’s written message.

Is electronic “Thank You” is the only way for you? Consider using one of the greeting card sites, such as 123 Greetings or EcardsforBoss who specialize in boss related messages. You’ll find some serious and humorous cards and often you can add your own personal message. Avoid the free cards; they could contain advertisements or their message may not be as relevant.

BEST APPROACH: Send a personalize note in a simple card.

Reading time: 3 – 4 minutes

Do you promote the team ahead of yourself? It might be tempting. And it might be a career misstep.

It is easy to fall into the trap that I should always promoting someone else, at some point though, you may think…what about me? Why doesn’t everyone else play by the same rules and watch my back too? The reason is they are probably doing a better job of promoting themselves than you are.

The Center for Creative Leadership, provides an audio transcript, Politics of Self Promotion: Using Visibility to Benefit you, Your Team and Your Organization which outlines five limiting beliefs to promoting your own successes, taken from the book, Selling Yourself without Selling Out: A Leader’s Guide to Ethical Self-Promotion (J-B CCL (Center for Creative Leadership)). How often does someone remind you or your self talk tells you the following are truths:

• Accomplishments should speak for themselves
• My boss is too busy to hear me talk about myself
• Team players don’t take credit
• Not wanting to brag
• Discomfort promoting yourself

Let’s face it. Bosses are busy. They tend to focus on what is wrong and often forget or overlook the positives. I believe bosses want to reinforce and recognize good work and they need the help of their employees to do it. Too often I hear employees couch accomplishments in terms of what the team did…and I have to wonder, what was your contribution or role in this effort? At a minimum, you should be able to answer this question. In the ideal situation, I should never have to ask the question.

I am not advocating that you dump your team and only center discussions on yourself. Just remember to include yourself and quit playing the martyr role. Martyrs have the “poor me” attitude and love to blame others for their misfortune. In the case of your career, the majority of the successes or missteps sit right with you.

Ultimately, it is your responsibility to handle your own internal promotional campaign. In a previous blog, Mastering the Art of Self Promotion, the case is made for why and how to undertake a new outlook on managing your career. It touches on all five of the limiting beliefs offered by the authors, Gina Hernez-Broome, Cindy McClaughlin and Stephanie Trovas.

Careers are made on your individual contributions, not team contributions. I can’t think of one instance in my career where the team receives a promotion as a unit. Do you have to be a team player? Yes. Should it define you. No.