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Have you ever thought about why conflict exists and where is the source? I often wonder if we have more conflict with people who are more similar or dissimilar to ourselves.
If we take the more similar approach, the adage goes….you will attract others and conversely if you are opposite to one another, you will repel each other. How does this play out in the work environment? Are teams more effective if we select people like us? Will we get done faster or more efficiently or produce a better outcome?
Let’ consider the other view….opposites attract. Do we naturally want to work with people who are different from us? Is it because they bring something new to the experience or we are just curious how the the half lives? Will we experience more conflict in these situations because our starting points are so far apart or is it conceivable we will find the middle ground? Does it take longer to work with people different from us?
Other thought provokers:
- Is there more conflict in groups that are similar or dissimilar? Why?
- Does group size make a difference? What about two people who work together?
- Should we be designing conflict into our teams?
- Does similarity breed boredom?
- Are opposites too hard to manage?
- Does your opposite make you complete?
- Do cultural differences play a role?
Share your philosophy on conflict or an example where being more similar or dissimilar was a benefit or hindrance.
Article by Lynn Dessert
Lynn Dessert is an executive coach and training expert on cognitive development and personal effectiveness - facilitating behavior change for individuals and teams. Clients consult her to design and deliver HBDI leadership development programs and career minded individuals engage her for personal development. Lynn is the author of Elephants at Work and owner of Leadership Breakthrough, Inc. specializing in Executive, Leadership and Career Development. Start your discovery process by contacting her at 585.249.5149 today.
Lynn has written 273 awesome articles for us at Elephants at Work
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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
Ya know, I’ve long held to the theory that we tend more to hate or dislike people who are more like us than those different from us. I suspect that I’ve always been more irritated by those who are more like me than different. Take, for example, religion: Rivalry and bitterness are more prevalent between different Christian denominations than between, say, Christians and Buddhists.
I don’t know whether it is because we can’t find a place for argument or disagreement when we have little common ground with others or because there’s some sort of “psychosis” related to seeing a reflection of ourselves and thus seeing all the shortcomings/failings.